THE STORY AFTER THE MOMENT
I was coaching a sales leader a few months back. Solid guy. Respected leader. Successful team. One area he wanted to improve on was his physical health. Like many of us, he’d let time slip as he got busy.
He told me: "I don't know why I can't get my physical health right. I know what to do. I just can't stick with it. It’s a constant stop and start. And when I miss, it takes me weeks - or longer sometimes - to go again. I completely fall off the wagon.”
A familiar story, for sure. I asked him: "What do you tell yourself when you miss a workout?"
He paused. "I tell myself I'm lazy. That I always do this. That I'll never change."
That was it.
He wasn't stuck because of his schedule.
He wasn’t stuck because he failed.
He was stuck because of what he told himself in the two minutes after.
Your identity isn't shaped by your successes. It's shaped by what you tell yourself after your failures. Negative self-talk fuels The Drift.
Two minutes. That's all it takes to reinforce the identity you don't want or build the one you do.
Here's the brutal truth: 60% of men experience daily anxiety, frustration, or despair. Many can't remember the last time they felt confident.
Why? Because they've been practicing the wrong script for years.
Every time you fail and tell yourself you're broken, you're practicing being broken. Every time you mess up and decide that's just who you are, you're becoming that person.
But it works the other way too.
Every time you fail and tell yourself you're someone who learns, you're practicing growth. Every time you refuse to make failure your identity, you're building who you want to become.
Your life isn't defined by what happens. It's defined by what you tell yourself in the two minutes after.
📌 QUOTE OF THE WEEK "Watch your thoughts, they become your words; watch your words, they become your actions; watch your actions, they become your habits; watch your habits, they become your character; watch your character, it becomes your destiny." - Lao Tzu
🧠 INSIGHT: Belief shapes identity. Identity shapes actions. Actions shape outcomes. If we want to get better, we must believe better about ourselves.
🏋🏻♀️ NO DRIFT CHALLENGE
Track your self-talk this week. Every time something goes wrong - big or small -write down what you tell yourself in the next two minutes. Don't edit it. Just capture it.
At the end of the week, read your list.
Ask yourself: "If I believed this script for the next 10 years, who would I become?"
If you don't like the answer, rewrite it.
I’d love to hear how you are fighting The Drift this week. Reply to this email to let me know. Even better, post it on Instagram and tag @no.drift. Let’s build a community of encouragement there.
CLOSING THOUGHT
If you wouldn’t hang out with someone who talks to you the way you talk to you, it’s time to change. Call yourself up, not out.
For you,
Kevin
Thanks for reading this. Share it with anybody you think would find it useful. And as a reminder, NO DRIFT is not mine it is ours. I want to know what you think, what you want to hear about, what you are learning. All feedback is welcomed.