THE DRIVER'S SEAT
Last week, we talked about the power of belief. We established that to stop drifting, you have to believe better. But once you start aiming for something higher, you’re going to run into a very loud, very persuasive problem:
How you feel.
We live in a culture that worships "authenticity," which is often just a fancy way of saying "doing whatever your mood tells you to do." We are told to "follow our hearts" and "trust our gut” and “you do you.”
But let’s be honest: your gut is often afraid. Your heart is often selfish. And if you let your feelings make your decisions, you will spend your entire life drifting in circles.
Which is why Rule #7 of NO DRIFT is this:
Feelings Don’t Win.
Feel feelings, but don’t give them the keys to the car.
This isn't about being a robot. It’s not about suppressing your emotions or pretending they don’t exist. In fact, if you try to ignore your feelings, they usually just get louder and do more damage down the road.
The goal isn't to be emotionless - it is to be emotionally disciplined.
The Passenger Principle
Think of your life as a cross-country road trip.
Your emotions - fear, excitement, anxiety, boredom, frustration - are all passengers in that car. Some of them are great company. Some of them are obnoxious and won't stop complaining about the music.
Anxiety might warn you that the "Check Engine" light is on.
Excitement might keep you awake during a long stretch of highway.
Fear might point out that you’re driving too fast in the rain.
But here is the non-negotiable rule: None of them get to drive.
The moment you let Fear take the wheel, you pull over and stop. The moment you let Boredom take the wheel, you veer off the road looking for a distraction. The moment you let Fatigue take the wheel, you quit before you reach the destination.
Action Over Affect
The drifting mind waits until it "feels like it" to take action.
"I’ll start the workout when I feel motivated."
"I’ll have that hard conversation when I feel confident."
"I’ll do the deep work when I feel inspired."
The intentional man who lives above the line does the opposite. They understand that action is the cause of feeling, not just the result.
If you wait for the feeling to show up before you start, you are a slave to your chemistry. You don't "feel" your way into a new way of acting. You act your way into a new way of feeling.
"The only way to get rid of the fear of doing something is to go out and do it." - Susan Jeffers
The Challenge
This week, identify the "Passenger" that has been trying to grab the steering wheel.
Is it Procrastination telling you that you'll be more "creative" tomorrow? Is it Resentment telling you not to be the first one to apologize? Is it Comfort telling you that you’ve done "enough" for one day?
Acknowledge the feeling. Say, "I hear you, I feel you, but you aren't driving today."
Then, put your hands back on the wheel and execute. You control you.
Feelings are great consultants, but they are terrible CEOs.
Live above the line.
For you,
Kevin
How useful was this newsletter for you?
Thanks for reading this. Share it with anybody you think would find it useful. And as a reminder, NO DRIFT is not mine it is ours. I want to know what you think, what you want to hear about, what you are learning. All feedback is welcomed.